my little brother, in a video my by older brother my experience ever since i was a kid, my brothers have skated. my little brother was one and a half when he learned, he could hardly form sentences, but would come with our mum to pick us up from school on a tiny skateboard -- rolling speedy up the hill to the school buildings. i always wanted to do it, in some ways i have skated all my life: but for some reason i have always been scared to do as much as i wanted. i think growing up as a girl with an older sister in the 2000s -- where gendered marketing was at it's peak -- i never recognised my uncomfortable sense of not feeling quite right in the "girly" norms; i was just a tomboy, fitting in. when i was around eleven or twelve penny boards were all around, so of course i had one (or, stole my brother's sweet yellow one periodically), but still it wasn't really what i wanted -- i was just conforming. i remember days where we could skate in the garden